Month: May 2024

Marrying Your Creativity

MarlonLeave a comment

Managing your creativity is a lot like managing a healthy marriage. They both start off with a honeymoon period where everything is fun, fresh, and exciting, but then the prospect of living happily ever after gets challenged when reality starts to set in. You knew it couldn’t always be rainbows and unicorns forever. When the dust has settled and the initial excitement is gone, you are then left with confronting some challenging aspects of your project. And in turn, if you have any sense, confronting your own demons in the process as well.

Today, we’re going to take a look at how you can manage your creativity in the same way so that you don’t end up with the proverbial divorce, or at the very least, unhappy marriage that you feel stuck in. Once you understand how the phases of a project mirror the phases of a marriage, and how cyclical they actually often turn out to be, the better equipped you’ll be with committing to your creativity with all earnestness instead of committing to it out of necessity, or worse, outright abandoning it.

There are three phases in a creative project that mirror a marriage and they are:

  1. The Honeymoon
  2. Slap From Reality
  3. Renewing Your Vows

The Honeymoon

The Honeymoon is every creator’s favourite part and wish could last forever. And how could you not? Little to no effort is required. All you gotta do is sit back and relax enjoying the company of your favourite person in the world. Likewise, with a creative project, getting to work on it at the beginning can feel so effortless because you’re overwhelmed by your excitement for the novelty of a fresh new idea, so you hit the ground running and work at it to your heart’s content, and sometimes even to the point of burn out.

But what if I told you that despite of how great this phase is in a project, it’s actually not the best part of it? It’s definitely there to entice you and motivate you to accept all cognitive demand it may require. Whether you’re writing a novel, composing a song, or painting a picture, you know that it takes a lot of patience and focus to create. It just doesn’t feel that way because the initial euphoria of stumbling upon a fresh new idea makes the difficulty of its conception feel easy breezy.

Much like in a new relationship or a marriage, you look past the red flags and do your best to keep the peace because you just want to bask in all the positives of your partner. Likewise with your project, you want to build it up in your mind as this next best thing that your genius has conjured up, so you’re bound to look past its flaws and maybe even your own flaws as a creator.

Until, of course, you get a…

Slap From Reality

After several weeks into a project, you start to see where it may not be the greatest thing after all. Maybe you have a plot-hole you’ve yet to figure how to cover up. Maybe an entire section of your song bogs down the pacing. Or maybe you have some bland colours that aren’t really making your image pop the way it should be popping. Whatever the case may be, creators are always confronted with the things their ego begin to remind them of: you and everything you make will always have fundamental flaws in them.

And so the resistance becomes stronger. Your initial passion for the project begins to wane and you wake up less and less excited each morning to tackle it. Instead of wanting to do it first thing in the morning, you shy away from it, anxious and exhausted merely from avoiding it. You might even start to feel guilty for doing so and the sunk cost fallacy makes you believe that you might as well continue ignoring your problems because if you’ve already gone this long on procrastinating, what are the chances of actually recovering if you gave it a shot now?

Well, you never know until you try is what I always say. In my opinion, this slap from reality is actually the best part of the creative process. Many people fear it for being difficult, but growth is found in overcoming difficult obstacles. And in order for you and your project/marriage to grow, you’ve got to be willing to fight for what you once had and breathe new life into it. You made a commitment and you’ve got to be willing to see it to the end, and with all earnestness, not obligation.

Renewing Your Vows

Marriages and creators who have stood the test of time have done so because of their commitment to renewal. Of course anything can get boring and difficult when you have too much of it. Too much of a good thing is a bad thing, after all. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have that good thing forever and always and still be able to appreciate it further down the line. It takes a renewal of perspective and the courage to grow in order to maintain it.

So with whatever project you’re working on right now, if it has you down in the dumps, try and revive your love for it by reminding you of what got you interested in the first place. If it no longer resonates with you, try and think hard about what new meaning you can add to it in your life and how this renewed version of it can push you forward. Or if you haven’t even started on a project in fear of reality slapping you in the face, you now at least know to expect that phase to disrupt your initial joy with it.

But don’t fret because like a good marriage, projects will have their ups and downs. Your true character and your commitment to your craft will often be tested to see how badly you want to express whatever your current project is meant to express. Whether it’s what you truly feel or you’re discovering what you truly feel through it, you will never know unless you see it through to the end.

And if you can do that, maybe you will get to experience a happily ever after.

The Top 4 R’s Creators Need to Know Retiring

MarlonLeave a comment

As outlined in a previous post, every creative project has its cycle that kind of resembles a marriage. There’s a honeymoon phase where everything is fresh, fun, and exciting. Then when things start to settle down happily ever after is only possible through commitment. Yet, despite the commitment creators put into their work, sometimes we reach a point where we might have to divorce ourselves from a project before it can be completed.

We all hope that we get to see our creative projects to the very end. For every completed work of art out there—published novels, movies with theatrical releases, music that the whole world can listen to etc.—there are probably thousands of other works that go left unfinished each day. This could be due to a number of factors like budget constraints, creators being swallowed by resistance, or in some unfortunate cases, death.

Because tomorrow is not a guarantee for any of us, we must try to do as much as humanly possible, each day, to see our vision come to life. Whether we get to the end of the project or not, it’s important to give it our all each day so that God forbid it’s our last, we would have had a lot to show for it rather than dying with the regret over how much we procrastinated. This may sound a little too morbid, and edging on the toxic productivity side, but I assure there are many ways around burning out from keeping this in mind, while also being able to create as boldly as we can each day.

Today we will cover The Top 3 R’s Creators Need to Know Before Retiring:

  1. Resilience
  2. Reward
  3. Reflection
  4. Recovery

Resilience

We often talk about the resistance that comes with creativity here on Your Write to Live. The resistance that our ego feeds us by filling our heads with doubt, perfectionism, and maybe some full on self loathing, which will all prevent us from sitting down and doing the work that is important to us. The positive antithesis to this resistance is resilience, which is your ability to withstand boredom, frustration, and distractions.

When a creative project starts to wear you down making you feel bored and/or frustrated, you need to develop the resilience to push through that resistance. If you are under the obligation to complete a project for a paying client and you have hard deadlines to meet, this is just an unfortunate blow to your energy levels that you need to take to see it to the end. But if you’re a hobby creator, there’s a bit more leeway to pace yourself and reduce the amount of work you do each day, but in no way should you quit when revelations in your work just might be on the other side of resilience.

When we begin to feel bored and/or frustrated by our creative projects, it is also easy to get distracted by unimportant things and end up using them as excuses for our early retirement for the day. Or maybe even for life if we let it get that bad. That means reducing your use of social media, not playing as many video games as you usually do, and most importantly resisting the urge to reward yourself too prematurely.

Reward


While it is important to resist the urge to reward yourself too prematurely, it is still important that you do reward yourself for your efforts. This can look like many different things based on your preferences, but personally for me, after a hard day of work I like to reward myself by playing video games or watching a movie. If I’ve engaged my brain enough in cognitively active work, it’s nice to finally sit back and engage it more passively with entertainment.

I’ve said before that the real reason why we can’t relax and enjoy things unless we’ve done difficult things is because of brain activity more than it has anything to do with our moral standing. To recap, it’s not about chastising yourself for not being productive, and that you don’t deserve to reward yourself if you haven’t been creating, rather it’s about having turned your brain on enough and emptied it out of its potential content before soaking in someone else’s artwork that makes entertainment more enjoyable.

Furthermore, as good as these post-work-session rewards may be, you must also remember to perceive your work as the ultimate reward to yourself. To your soul. You’re expressing something from every fiber of your being whenever you decide to engage your creativity, and that’s serious business, so give it the respect that it deserves by giving it your full attention.

Reflection

After you’ve created as much as you could for the day and rewarded yourself accordingly, then it’s time to reflect on the day. Think about all the hardship you may have faced during your creative hours and assess yourself as honestly as possible. Were there moments where you were just phoning it in because resistance was creeping up? Was the reward proportionate to the amount of the work you did or was it too excessive? And was the reward in any way valuable and appropriate to your purpose?

Ask yourself these questions and more so that for the next day, you know how to do better. Every day we create something, we learn a little bit more about ourselves. Sometimes it’s about how we handle the process itself in regards to how patient we might be with ourselves when faced with difficulty. Or sometimes our own work that’s meant to touch the souls of others ends up touching our own and opening our eyes to something about ourselves in ways that were not possible had we not took on the project in the first place.

If you’ve been around Your Write to Live for a while you know this, but if you’re new here I must state that that’s what we’re all about here: growth through daily milestones. So long as your growing in any amount of increments you’re capable of, small and large alike, that’s all that matters. So reflect on how you can grow from today’s work and allow these lessons to carry you for the next day and beyond.

Recovery

After everything is said and done then it’s time for some rest and recovery. I know I sounded morbid earlier saying how we don’t have much time on this Earth, so you better create as much as you can each day or it’s a waste, but rest and recovery is just as important as the consistent creativity we aim to strive for when it’s feasible and possible. You just have to be honest and realistic about where you’re at physically, mentally, and chronologically in terms of other life responsibilities.

It’s all about meeting a healthy balance between hard work and rest, never straying too excessively on one side for the sake of the other. Even if you’re under a strict deadline, it’s never worth your physical health to get something done, or you will literally put the dead in deadline. Likewise, if you’re always in rest and recovery mode when you’re more than perfectly capable to get back to work, you might die a little on the inside at the level of your soul. You’re a creator. You’re meant to create. Not doing so leaves with you a lot of unexpressed emotion and potential.

Take as much time as you need and no more and no less. For instance, as of writing this blog post, I have gone six straight weeks consistently writing in my journal, writing for this blog, and working on my passion project every single week day almost without fail. I may have missed one of these things on some days, but for the most part I’ve remained consistent. I can feel myself feeling tired from all the effort I put into stifling my resistance, so I know that next week or two weeks from now, it would be wise to either slow it down considerably or take a week long break to recharge.

As should you if you’ve done all you could to stifle your own resistance.