Tag: Inspiration

The Top 4 R’s Creators Need to Know Retiring

MarlonLeave a comment

As outlined in a previous post, every creative project has its cycle that kind of resembles a marriage. There’s a honeymoon phase where everything is fresh, fun, and exciting. Then when things start to settle down happily ever after is only possible through commitment. Yet, despite the commitment creators put into their work, sometimes we reach a point where we might have to divorce ourselves from a project before it can be completed.

We all hope that we get to see our creative projects to the very end. For every completed work of art out there—published novels, movies with theatrical releases, music that the whole world can listen to etc.—there are probably thousands of other works that go left unfinished each day. This could be due to a number of factors like budget constraints, creators being swallowed by resistance, or in some unfortunate cases, death.

Because tomorrow is not a guarantee for any of us, we must try to do as much as humanly possible, each day, to see our vision come to life. Whether we get to the end of the project or not, it’s important to give it our all each day so that God forbid it’s our last, we would have had a lot to show for it rather than dying with the regret over how much we procrastinated. This may sound a little too morbid, and edging on the toxic productivity side, but I assure there are many ways around burning out from keeping this in mind, while also being able to create as boldly as we can each day.

Today we will cover The Top 3 R’s Creators Need to Know Before Retiring:

  1. Resilience
  2. Reward
  3. Reflection
  4. Recovery

Resilience

We often talk about the resistance that comes with creativity here on Your Write to Live. The resistance that our ego feeds us by filling our heads with doubt, perfectionism, and maybe some full on self loathing, which will all prevent us from sitting down and doing the work that is important to us. The positive antithesis to this resistance is resilience, which is your ability to withstand boredom, frustration, and distractions.

When a creative project starts to wear you down making you feel bored and/or frustrated, you need to develop the resilience to push through that resistance. If you are under the obligation to complete a project for a paying client and you have hard deadlines to meet, this is just an unfortunate blow to your energy levels that you need to take to see it to the end. But if you’re a hobby creator, there’s a bit more leeway to pace yourself and reduce the amount of work you do each day, but in no way should you quit when revelations in your work just might be on the other side of resilience.

When we begin to feel bored and/or frustrated by our creative projects, it is also easy to get distracted by unimportant things and end up using them as excuses for our early retirement for the day. Or maybe even for life if we let it get that bad. That means reducing your use of social media, not playing as many video games as you usually do, and most importantly resisting the urge to reward yourself too prematurely.

Reward


While it is important to resist the urge to reward yourself too prematurely, it is still important that you do reward yourself for your efforts. This can look like many different things based on your preferences, but personally for me, after a hard day of work I like to reward myself by playing video games or watching a movie. If I’ve engaged my brain enough in cognitively active work, it’s nice to finally sit back and engage it more passively with entertainment.

I’ve said before that the real reason why we can’t relax and enjoy things unless we’ve done difficult things is because of brain activity more than it has anything to do with our moral standing. To recap, it’s not about chastising yourself for not being productive, and that you don’t deserve to reward yourself if you haven’t been creating, rather it’s about having turned your brain on enough and emptied it out of its potential content before soaking in someone else’s artwork that makes entertainment more enjoyable.

Furthermore, as good as these post-work-session rewards may be, you must also remember to perceive your work as the ultimate reward to yourself. To your soul. You’re expressing something from every fiber of your being whenever you decide to engage your creativity, and that’s serious business, so give it the respect that it deserves by giving it your full attention.

Reflection

After you’ve created as much as you could for the day and rewarded yourself accordingly, then it’s time to reflect on the day. Think about all the hardship you may have faced during your creative hours and assess yourself as honestly as possible. Were there moments where you were just phoning it in because resistance was creeping up? Was the reward proportionate to the amount of the work you did or was it too excessive? And was the reward in any way valuable and appropriate to your purpose?

Ask yourself these questions and more so that for the next day, you know how to do better. Every day we create something, we learn a little bit more about ourselves. Sometimes it’s about how we handle the process itself in regards to how patient we might be with ourselves when faced with difficulty. Or sometimes our own work that’s meant to touch the souls of others ends up touching our own and opening our eyes to something about ourselves in ways that were not possible had we not took on the project in the first place.

If you’ve been around Your Write to Live for a while you know this, but if you’re new here I must state that that’s what we’re all about here: growth through daily milestones. So long as your growing in any amount of increments you’re capable of, small and large alike, that’s all that matters. So reflect on how you can grow from today’s work and allow these lessons to carry you for the next day and beyond.

Recovery

After everything is said and done then it’s time for some rest and recovery. I know I sounded morbid earlier saying how we don’t have much time on this Earth, so you better create as much as you can each day or it’s a waste, but rest and recovery is just as important as the consistent creativity we aim to strive for when it’s feasible and possible. You just have to be honest and realistic about where you’re at physically, mentally, and chronologically in terms of other life responsibilities.

It’s all about meeting a healthy balance between hard work and rest, never straying too excessively on one side for the sake of the other. Even if you’re under a strict deadline, it’s never worth your physical health to get something done, or you will literally put the dead in deadline. Likewise, if you’re always in rest and recovery mode when you’re more than perfectly capable to get back to work, you might die a little on the inside at the level of your soul. You’re a creator. You’re meant to create. Not doing so leaves with you a lot of unexpressed emotion and potential.

Take as much time as you need and no more and no less. For instance, as of writing this blog post, I have gone six straight weeks consistently writing in my journal, writing for this blog, and working on my passion project every single week day almost without fail. I may have missed one of these things on some days, but for the most part I’ve remained consistent. I can feel myself feeling tired from all the effort I put into stifling my resistance, so I know that next week or two weeks from now, it would be wise to either slow it down considerably or take a week long break to recharge.

As should you if you’ve done all you could to stifle your own resistance.

Taking Stock When You Get Stuck

Marlon8 Comments

Have you ever pursued a goal for so long that it felt like you were going nowhere fast?

How about having no goals at all and going nowhere even faster?

Whichever one you’ve experienced, I hope this Meaningful Monday post can help you!

I think I’ve recently started to crack the code on how to handle Goal Setting Anxiety. The key words here, of course, are “started to,” since I don’t think it’ll ever be a fully solveable problem, just a problem in which you can equip yourself with the most tools as possible.

Whenever I feel stuck in an aspect of my life I try to take stock of where I’ve been. It helps put things into perspective when you appreciate all that you’ve accomplished thus far, and the whole journey that has lead you up to that very moment of doubt in which you wonder if any of your hard work and toil will ever amount to anything.

For example, when it comes to writing my novels, I often feel like I may have wasted 10 years of my life not having published anything yet. It makes me regret the time I’ve spent writing several novels and drafts, and not to mention all of the pre-work that goes into writing even a single page word on the actual manuscripts. This includes chapter charts, character graphs, and most especially; all of the time I’ve spent trying to psych myself back up after burning out.

This usually involves a long and intense Progress Journal in which I take stock of what I’ve accomplished so far as to not get too intimidated by all of the work that lies ahead. And the tricky thing is using the exact same thoughts that give me anxiety and transform them into reminders of the time I invested in my work, as opposed to wasted.

It’s not a waste that I did all this work and am still not published. Many writers write for decades before they get published, let alone feel like they can have something worth publishing.

Nowadays I often remind myself to take stock of the fact that while I could have been blowing all my money on mindless hedonism and lied around my house doing nothing, I actually paid for my own education for the past decade. My bookshelfs are chock full with writing guides that cover the basics such as plot structure, to more sophisticated aspects of writing such as style and prose, as well as how to write more emotionally meaningful and impactful stories.

It’s thanks to all those days and nights I’ve spent studying at cafes, libraries, or at the comfort of my own home that I can no longer experience stories the same way as a passive participant. Any movie or TV show show I watch, any book I read, hell even any video game I play that has a story–my experience of stories have been greatly transformed thanks to my studies and make me want to dissect every other story to their core.

In turn, I get to critically view my own work and know what can work better based on what I’ve come to love in other stories.

And furthermore, it’s no joke that I’m writing a novel.

It’s hard work!

I’m on my fourth draft and my fourth year of writing the same novel from scratch.

I could easily waste time worrying about how I haven’t “gotten there yet,” and maybe a bit of anxiety towards that is healthy to make me want to plunge myself forward. But without taking stock of where I already am thanks to my past self putting in those countless hours, I may very well stay stuck where I am, paralyzed by my fear.

 

I think a healthy dose of fear and pride can help you moving forward.

You want to be proud of everything you’ve accomplished thus far and be honest about how hard a lot of it has been. Take pride in the fact that you’ve survived it all and have grown from the experience. But you don’t want to be so proud that you think you’re perfectly fine where you are. Instead, you take where you are as a marker of your capabilities.

Then you also want to be a little afraid of not being where you could be. Know that you have long ways to go to achieving your goals and the zig zagging path’s been laid before you the moment you’ve accepted the challenge. Be fearful of how much regret you might feel in the future if you never give yourself the opportunity to thrive. But you don’t want to be so fearful that you feel like you can’t do anything at all and you’ll never get anywhere. Use your fears as helpful antagonists that push you further and further away from your dangerous comfort zone.

Whenever you feel stuck in life, take stock of where you’re at.

Recognize your greatness that has taken you this far.

Recognize how much more work there is to be done and trust that you can do it.

 

 

Being Ready For Never Being Ready

MarlonLeave a comment

We come into existence safe and secure, hugged snugly by the womb

We start off as the largest and only thing in a tiny cozy world only to become one of the many tiniest things in a world much larger than ourselves.

We are born naked and crying in a room full of strangers, and apart from its complete opposite (death), it’s actually the scariest thing we have to experience in our lives if you stop to think about it.

Being put in the world is a pretty daunting thought because we are tasked with the responsibility of creating an effect in the world just as much as the world has the responsibility of creating an effect in us. We come into this world knowing nothing but what our environment will allow us to know, and then we have to learn how to unlearn some of the limiting beliefs we’re fed as we grow.

I think everybody is born with tremendous potential and due to circumstances out of their control, along with mindsets and choices that are, that potential wanes and the world misses out on whatever unique gifts some people possibly had that could have been contributed to the world.

This is the perspective I come from when I try to battle my own self doubt.

I’ve often felt unready to take on the world throughout my life. Whether it was going to school, finding a job, and fast forwarding to now; running my own business. There’s no safety and security in entrepeneurship like a normal job offers; I am not bound by a schedule other than what I grant myself to work in, and there’s definitely no expected amount of money on a regularly scheduled paycheck. My income rests solely on the amount of work I’m willing to put into making sales at my workshops and coaching spots.

It is now near the end of 2017–and after spending the first half of the year in solitary seclusion, writing the 3rd draft of It Starts at Home and for the most part living like a hermit spending the rest of my days gaming and listening to music for countless of hours–I have finally officially launched my business and still feel unready to do it. But I am doing it, which is the crazy thing.

The only difference now compared to my hermit days is that I feel just a tad more ready than before.

It has taken a lot of my own will power and discipline to realize that I am capable of so much in my life, especially if I have been able to provide value to the coaching clients I had in the summer of 2016. Knowing that I possess this rare gift of active listening and questioning that makes writers geek out about their stories, it reminds me that I do have value in the world after all.

Furthermore, when it came to booking and preparing the writing workshops I’ve been hosting the past couple of months, a lot of resistance came up due to feeling unprepared in several areas. I worried that I wouldn’t have content, attendees, let alone the confidence to talk about writing for 2 hours biweekly–even though I spent the past couple of years in customer service jobs where I had to speak to hundreds of customers on a daily basis.

What helped me push onward was to prepare myself as best as I could.

That meant buckling down to write up the workshop presentations, refining it over and over again until every point was succint and important, cutting all excess. It also meant putting the work into inviting people to the workshop and even more work into reminding myself that I’ve done so much public speaking in my life already.

From hosting escape room introductions to talking about writing concepts that came solely from within was a hard transition because now I was sharing something that wasn’t created by anyone else but myself. But nonetheless I persisted.

And when it all came down to it, on the days I have hosted workshops, I still felt unready.

In fact, many times I wanted to cancel on the account of nervousness.

Now whether or not there was a huge turn out or not, in the end I decided to just go with it. I am thankful for the times that several people came, and even more thankful for that one workshop where nobody showed up because that was my biggest fear, and to have it manifest and not actually feel all that bad, it has been an incredible experience being prepared for either outcome.

That’s the most we can ever do for ourselves in this life. To prepare ourselves for the best and worst case scenarios because even it only softens the blow of disappointment, it at least teaches us to prepare better next time. And of course when things do go our way, we can also be grateful to ourselves for having put the effort into preparation in the first place.

I’m sorry if this post was very scatter brained, I’ve probably rewrote it several times and I’m still unable to put it as concisely as I wanted to.

But if there’s one take away from it all, it would be this:

Trust in yourself.

Trust in your own abilities.

Trust in your ability to recover and take it easy on yourself if you “fail.”

You have tremendous potential and just because you miss out on a single chance  to share your gift, it doesn’t mean you are completely barred from ever getting another opportunity in the future. You pick yourself up and try again. If you need time to recover like I granted myself, you give that to yourself too, but always be back to reengage with the world.